I can't believe I am writing
this. This is so hard for me. On May 18, 2008, I lost my best friend, my
child, my other half. And to this day, NOTHING has been the same. I feel
like there is this huge hole in my heart. Losing her has left me feeling
so empty, so alone. She stole my heart. And she still has it. I would give
anything to see her face and kiss her head one more time. To spend one more
day by her side. She was the most amazing thing to ever happen to me and
I can't believe I'm going through life without her. She was my rock. I only
needed her, I never needed anyone else. I miss her so much words can't even
Katie was a 4 year-old
appendix quarter horse who stole my heart the moment I saw her. It was exactly
8 days after she turned two when I signed the papers and handed the breeders
the check for her. But I had been working with her for many months. It was
June 9, 2006, and I was the happiest girl in the world. I broke her and trained
her and we showed in the Hunter ring and never got below a reserve champion.
She was the most amazing 4 year-old you were ever going to meet. People actually
asked me how old she was and when I told them they wouldn't believe me. She
was the most perfect, well-mannered horse I had ever met in my 10 year riding
Then in August 2007, we
had a very serious internal injury. She had bone chips floating around in
both hocks. She didn't even want to move. She was going to go to New Bolten,
but we chose Manor Equine. They did an amazing job with her and handled her
with extreme care. They treated her as if she were worth a million bucks,
but in my eyes she was. There was no price on life. I would've done whatever
needed to be done. She had the surgery and healed perfectly. So over the
winter we re-trained and got back in the ring mid-April. We had 2 shows under
our belt and then the day of our 3rd show, tragedy struck.
May 18, 2008 - Katie went
into a colic she would never come out of. I arrived at the barn at 5:15 a.m.
to see Katie rolling around in the small paddock where she stayed before
shows. I got her up off the ground and washed her off and brought her into
the barn. She was in crossties and she was trying to lay down and roll. I
knew it was serious when I saw her. My trainer then arrived and called
the vet and got his answering service because he wasn't awake at this hour.
She left, along with all of my friends and their horses to the show, them
all telling me she was going to be okay. I was at the farm alone with my
horse dying right in front of my eyes. It hurt so bad to see her in this
much pain. I looked into her eyes and I could see how much it hurt. She was
looking right at me, this killed me. Seven o'clock rolled around and I
called my trainer at the show and I was crying hysterically. My horse
had fallen down, she was bleeding from all little nicks and scrapes and she
wasn't getting up. I sat down in the mud with her. She had her head resting
in my lap and I whispered to her, "Katie, I promise I won't let anything
happen to you. We're going to make it through this, you're a tough girl, I
The vet shows up to see this sight. He does all his tests and tells me the
prognosis is not good. She twisted up her intestines. And we could either
do surgery for eight thousand dollars or euthanize her. At this point she
couldn't even get up. We were going to do the surgery even though the survival
rate was 25% and I would never be able to ride her again. But he tested her
abdominal fluid, which is supposed to be light yellow, and it came out dark
yellow. Which automatically disqualifies her for the surgery. I was in the
barn cleaning up my stuff, I didn't know at this point she was disqualified.
My dad walks into the barn with tears rolling down his face. I was like,
"Dad, what's wrong?" He said, "Sarah, I think we're going to have to
put Katie down.". I fell to the ground and started bawling my eyes out,
screaming, "No! We can't! No!". He picked me up and just held me in his arms
telling me we had to. I ran out to her paddock and sat with her in the mud.
My tears were falling off my face to her face. I didn't want to let her go.
Just then I hear my trainer's truck and I see everyone from the show pulling
up the driveway. My mom had called my trainer and told her. They all crowded
around me telling me I can't watch her be put down. They took me to the barn
and one of the ladys came in crying. I was like, "What''s wrong, is she okay?".
And she told me she was in heaven now. I turned to my trainer and
just started crying. My friend went back and got my horse's halter for me
and a piece of her tail. I still have both in my room to this day. I
never got to kiss that face again.
It's been 6 months since
she died. And on November 18, 2008, it will be 7 months. That is exactly
1 day before my Sweet 16th birthday. I miss her so much. It hurts.
Katie,You meant everything to
me. You have changed my life for the better. No one will ever forget you.
Especially me. No one will understand the bond we had. You were always there
to listen and when I just needed you there. You were definitely my
You'll always be my girl, my
everything. No horse will ever be able to replace you. You were my first
horse, my first love. You're my guardian angel. "Don't ride faster than your
guardian angel can fly." I love you with all of my heart.