Dear Sweet Nasty Boy,
It's almost 2 years since
I let you go. I still miss your sweet face and that low whicker of welcome
when I came to feed. We were blessed with a long time together. Thirty years
from when I first fell in love with that gangly yearling colt - mud up to
his knees and that shaggy baby coat.
Thirty years of being friends
and sharing every spare moment; trail riding and showing and just hanging
out. Then that moment 7 years ago when laminitis struck and changed our lives,
yours and mine. And it hurt and it was cold and dark and I couldn't make
But we tried, didn't we?
You and Dr. Pete and I. You were brave and stoic in the face of that pain.
Pete was patient and persistent, using all of his knowledge to help us. Then
you foundered a second time and a whole new world opened up for us. We found
that you were Insulin Resistant and had Cushings Disease. A new course of
treatment and an internet search brought us to the Equine Cushings group
You made friends for us.
All over the country, the world...Laurie and Harvey in New York. She helped
us and loved us every step of the way.
Lorna in Canada...so wise
and supportive. Dr. Kellon, our online vet and friend, whose counsel and
advice meant so much. Kathi, my best friend and yours, was there that last
day to hold us in her love.
And that last day in
May...dawned bright and clear...a glorious spring day in California. You
were waiting that morning, facing out to the big grassy paddock. You never
did that. But you knew that day, that the grass was for you, all for you.
And your friends came, bringing carrots and apples, ribbons for your mane
and tail, rose petals to strew in your path---you accepted it all as your
And then it was time. Pete
arrived. "Too soon. Too soon.", my heart cried. He gave us a few minutes,
then came forward. There is a photo of you arching your neck around him,
trying to see what was held behind his back. In seconds, it was over and
you were gone. There was a Black Phoebe calling from the corner of the barn.
My life with you was over.
The subject line of my
message to Equine Cushings was: "There's a hole in my world tonight." Now
a year and a half later, I am at peace with what had to happen that day.
I can feel your hoofbeats in my heart and know that you are running
All my love to you, sweet
Once grazed in the
Now canters among the stars
Used to roll in a meadow
Now trots along comet tails
Jumped over fences
Now soars through the clouds
Used to be mine
Now is God's