To my dearest Domino...The
It is hard to write about
you, just as it is hard to know that you have gone. You were not mine...but
you were mine in everything we ever did. My Domino.
When I first came to the
stables, you were there. You were there with your eyes so bright, your whiskers
trembling and your ears pointed forever forwards. I knew nothing. I had nothing.
But then I found you. And you became everything.
I remember so much of you.
I remember that you became MY pony and everyone knew it. I remember that
you used to prick your eyes and look at me when I came into your stable.
And I knew that, even as I walked away, you still stood with ears pricked,
watching me go.
And I remember when we
went riding, the world became whole again. You were not the fastest, the
most well trained, the most comfortable. But that did not matter. Because
when I sat on your back, everything made sense again. I was safe and I was
home. And even when everything else scared me, when I became almost too afraid
to ride - you stayed my rock. And you gave me my confidence back and let
me ride again.
Domino, you were the Jekyll
and Hyde of the ponies. You were the most curious, friendly, loving pony
I have ever met. You wanted to meet everyone and to see everything. You stayed
so young and alive for so long that I could never believe your advancing
years. To me, to everyone, you were still that 3 year-old baby, eager to
see the world. You stayed cheeky and adventurous and the spark that lit your
eyes was always there. Burning with a fury that just screamed, "I AM
But then there was your
other side, the side that allowed children to play around your feet and never
be in any harm. The side that carried and cared for the most nervous rider.
The side that stood absolutely still and allowed me to cry for hours when
Aphrodite went. The side that knew when I was sad and protected me as I sat
at your feet.
In those early years, Domino,
you were one of the most important things in my life. We have shared AMAZING
rides and swims on the beach. And they were brilliant because it was YOU
that was there.
But then recently, Domino,
you had to let go of me. As I grew older and wiser, I found new horses and
challenges I had to face. I used everything you ever taught me and I made
it through them. But it took time, and you had to step back for a while.
But you were still always there when i needed cheering up or just a friendly
face. And Domino, you never became any less special. But I just found less
and less time to tell you. How I regret that.
And in the week before
you died, you drew away from me. The fire that had burned so bright was
flickering and growing smaller, that ever curious expression became resigned
and uninterested. We tried, Domino, I promise you we tried. But you couldn't
I do not blame
you, Domino. It looks like you went quietly and I hope with all my heart
that was the case. And Domino...I knew. I knew, as I walked onto that yard
that you had gone. But that moment when it became official...I couldn't take
it. I did not cry and I am sorry. But something snapped inside. I could not
accept the news, you could not be dead. But then I saw you, I saw you lying
so peaceful and so beautiful on your bed. And suddenly, the tears just could
not stop. It felt like a piece of me had been torn away.
But I do not want to remember
you, remember you lying so still in that place. So instead I will think of
the last time I saw you alive.
You were sad and faced
the wall, eyes and ears dull. So I stood by you. And slowly but smoothly,
I stroked your neck, your back, your withers. And for the last time, that
connection was reborn. I relaxed and felt at one with the world. You relaxed
and those ears came forward, the eyes saw the light again. It was not you,
the Domino I knew had already died. But it was that last flicker of your
life that evening, your final goodbye.
Domino. My Bomb. I love
you so so much. Look at me, look at Sierra, Dallas, Beau and know that their
life and happiness was because of the curious little spotted pony with the