Tilly was in my life for
6 years. We grew up together, so to me that seems like a long time, but our
journey had only just begun. She belonged to my mum, but I loved her so much
I feel as if she was my own.
When we bought Tilly we were
completely unaware that she was in foal, so we had a wonderful surprise in
the form of a little piebald filly just months after we brought Tilly home.
We named her foal Blue Belle, because she was a bolt from the blue, and she
is a beautiful female.
Tilly came to me at a time
when I needed her the most. She helped me through my teenage years, through
my parents' divorce, and got me back my confidence in riding after I fell
from my first pony, Harvey. Countless times I cried into her mane and sat
in the corner of her box as she nuzzled me as if to tell me everything was
going to be OK. When I thought the world had turned its back on me, I just
had to take one look at my gorgeous horse to give me strength. She was there
for me through thick and thin and I can never thank her enough for
that.
The day she passed on will
never leave my memory. It happened on the 19th August 2007. We were at a
driving fun day, she just had a heart attack, fell down and never got
up. I have never felt so helpless in my life, just screaming as I watched
her lying there, surrounded by people desperately trying to help her. It
didn't seem real. I hate the fact that I couldn't hold her in her last moments,
tell her I loved her and tell her everything was going to be OK, just like
she 'told' me so many times. Me and mum held her and kissed her for what
felt like hours, but I just wanted to crawl under the blankets with her and
stay there forever. Walking away and leaving her lying there was the hardest
thing I've ever had to do. I only hope she heard every word and saw every
tear as we held our precious girl for the very last time.
She has taught me so
much, and even though she's gone from this world I know she will always be
with me. She had the kindest, gentlest soul and no matter how much it hurts
I'm going to hold onto her memory until the day I die.
Tilly, I'm sorry I wasn't
there for you right by your side when you needed ME the most, but please
know that you were so loved. There wasn't a dry eye in sight that afternoon.
You live on in your beautiful daughter and I promise you we will make you
so proud of her.
I know it will get easier
with time, but I promise you I will never forget you. I will carry you in
my heart forever, and I know that you will be there whenever I need you.
I'm missing you more and more as the days go by. Thank you for all the good
times, thank you for being there through the bad, and thank you for loving
me just the way I am. I will always love you, Tilly. Sleep tight, my little
star.
Rosie
Tilly 
