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Welsh Cob cross
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17 Years Young |
To my beloved pony, it has taken me so long to be able to sit and type this, I can't believe that you have gone. I wish so much I could stroke your face and kiss your nose again. I miss you so much it hurts and I can't believe how big a hole you have left in my life, nothing is as easy anymore.
Storm, or Fats, as I used to call him, came to me when he was six months old and completely wild. I just happened to go with the vet to watch some ponies being gelded, they had been attacked by dogs and beaten by the local children and most were destined for slaughter. But I saw you and fell in love. I went back at the weekend after pleading with my parents and bought him home.
He was in a yard for 3 months before I could touch him, but from the moment that trust was established, he was my best friend and I could do anything with him. He grew and learned so quickly that as a two year old he learned to bow, rear and stand on a box just to keep him occupied. From there he was broken and we used to spend hours out in the woods together. He had the most amazing jump and although he could be quite scary if you didn't know him as he would come across the field at you, he didn't do it to me. We used to play in the field together with him chasing me and then stopping and waiting for me to run after him and grab his leg. He would then turn and act as if he was going to bite but not actually take hold and then chase me again. This lasted hours and I could always tell when he wanted to play as he came marching across the field with a cheeky glint to his eye.
Storm was more than a pony, he was my mentor, my best friend and my life for 16 and a half years. He taught me more about life, love, trust, respect and forgiveness than anything or anyone. He was not always easy and we had days when he drove me mad, but I know he enjoyed doing it and he had a very good way of bringing me down to earth. His behaviour depended much on my moods and he spent so many hours listening to me (he was good at keeping secrets) with me just stroking or grooming him. I cannot explain on paper the bond we had, but he was the rock in my life, the pillar to my strength, my other half.
I had planned to do so much with Storm this year as he had been ridden by a friend for a while and I was so glad to have it just me and him again. We spent three months really happy and enjoying each others company, just out having fun together. When I went to the yard to ride on January 23rd and saw Storm covered in mud, I knew something serious was wrong. He had been fine the day before, came in and ate his tea and then checked and out again as he liked to be. It was a major shock, I rang the vet who came straightaway and referred him to an equine hospital. We managed to get him into box and on arrival they carried out tests on him with the opinion that he had colic, but unsure of why they asked for permission to operate.
The moment I said goodbye to you outside the theatre will stay with me forever. They had brushed you and you looked clean and relaxed. I said your name and even though you must have been in pain, you dropped your ear and spoke to me. I kissed you on the forehead and ear and looked into your eyes and said I would see you soon and that I loved you. You kind of looked at me to say its OK mum. I asked the vet to save you whatever the cost and she warned us that if you did pull through you would not be rideable for atl east a year. I told her it didn't matter, you were my best friend. But from the moment you went in, I knew that I was not going to see you alive again. I had to walk away to another room and that felt so so wrong.
After an hour and a half the vet came out to give the devastating news that 80 percent of your intestines had died due to a lypoma wrapping around them. This was a totally freak occurence with no known cause and nothing at all could be done to save you with that much damage. They asked for me to give permission to put you to sleep on the operating table.
After I spent hours on the internet in total disbelief that i had lost you so quickly to this, and through research, I found that pony geldings are more likely to get this, but there is no warning or pattern to it at all. Nothing that would have warned us or made you feel ill before the damage had been done and it was too late to save you.
This was the final thing I could do for you, Storm, to save you suffering and although I would have given anything in the world to bring you home, I knew that it would not be fair and that to bring you round from the anesthetic would only be for me and would not be fair on you. I hope you are pain free and at peace and I have the comfort knowing that from the day you arrived you had a good life and never suffered. My guilt and regret that I feel every day is that I did not go to the yard earlier to save you some of the final pain.
After I waited at the vets for what seemed like hours to see you and to collect your shoes and a lock of your hair, I sat with you and kissed you for that final time on your forehead. I drove home in shock and cried for days and days. I have your pictures in each room and your shoes and lock of mane in a special frame.
It has been very hard writing this to try and explain what we had in words and to do you justice and just want you to know that you were the best friend anyone could ever have. I am very grateful to have been owned by such a fantastic and brave pony. I am sure we will meet again and I hope your spirit stays with me. I will love you forever and will miss you every day. Thank you, Fats, for all you gave me. I cherish every memory we made together. I owe you so much xxxx.
I am sorry I was not there earlier and you are forever in my heart until we meet at rainbow bridge.
Sas xxx
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Storm 