The date is April 4, 2004
on a sunny, bright mid-morning, not quite two months after adopting two wild
mustang mares from the February adoption at the South Florida fairgrounds.
I was out feeding the horses and stopped to check the small bay mare that
we named Sulphur's Sego Lily, as she was due any day. She was happily eating
her grain and all appeared normal, with wary glances at me. Then I looked
underneath her and saw milk was dripping slowly from her teats, and as if
taking that as a cue, she stopped mid-chew and turned around and laid at
my feet and her water broke.
It all happened so fast that I barely had time to think. My Mom grabbed the
video camera and started filming as I snapped photos, two perfect feet slid
out followed by the rest of who I would come to call Sulphur's Primitive
Link. "Link." He was wonderful! His birth went smooth as silk and he was
standing 20 minutes later and soon finding the food supply. His coat was
creamy tan with a dark black stripe down his back and black zebra bars on
his front and back legs, coupled together with sweet brown eyes and a soft
gray nose. He was my dream come true and soon became the mascot of the Mustang
Club.
An hour after his birth, I separated him from Lily and had him sitting in
my lap on a lime green beanbag. That beanbag would become his best friend
and favorite toy.(Thank you, Ms Terry.) Time after time he would roll and
lay on it, pawing and twirling then grabbing and nuzzling it. As he grew
he would bite and stomp on it and would come galloping from the other side
of the yard and land mid-stride perfectly positioned on it.
He was growing like a weed and I couldn't be happier. We would
play and run together and if I called in my own special whinny, he would
answer and come running. Two months later, on June 10, our second foal, a
pitch black filly named Wyoming's Epona Rose, "Epona", was born. Thrilled
with a new playmate, the two were buddies and Link soon found that Kate (Epona's
mom) had milk enough for two and would leave his own mother to be with his
second family.
Time flew and before I knew it, he was 1 year old. He was turning
into such a handsome "prince" and his color was changing every day. He was
now half dun and half grullo. We celebrated his birthday and took photos
galore. How little I knew that I would treasure those pictures so dearly.
October 7, 2005. Link had just turned a year and 6 months. Just
a normal, typical autumn day with no inkling of the doom that was to come.
It was afternoon and hay had been passed around and it was now time to grain.
It had been raining and there were puddles in his paddock that he shared
with two PMU draft colts. I called him and he wouldn't come, and thinking
he merely didn't want to cross the water, I called again and he made his
way over to me, stopping 5 feet from the gate and crumbling into a pine tree
and laying at it's base. Shaken and scared, I grabbed a leadline and pulled
him up and out of the mud. He followed and tripped, nearly going down again,
his knees buckling and he was shaking. I led him to the round pen while Mommy
phoned a friend and asked if they had anything that would help him. I worked
him around the pen at a walk as he found his feet again and they came over
and gave him Gas-X and a shot of Banamine. It seemed to help and he passed
manure, not a lot, but some. So I put him in a stall where I could watch
him. He peed a lot and I thought he was getting better, just mild colic.
I was wrong.
Half an hour later he began to roll and was getting sweaty. I grabbed him
and took him to the pen again, trying to keep him on his feet, as minutes
passed and it got harder and harder to keep him up and he began to ignore
my cues and just drop to the ground and start rolling. This wasn't working.
Mom immediately called the vet while I tied him up, hoping if he couldn't
move he wouldn't roll. He still rolled, dragging the rope down and breaking
some boards. I put a cool hose on him as he was steaming and held him up
and he continually tried to flip himself in the water, which was pooling
at his hooves. Nothing was working, I walked him round and round for I don't
know how long, always having to look back to make sure he wouldn't fall on
me in his desperate search for relief, and pull him to his feet when he did
fall and rolled.
The vet arrived and gave him a shot to soothe him. It helped
and he stood still. The vet emptied his stomach and did some other stuff,
I don't know what he called. I didn't care. All I wanted was to have my happy
baby boy back again, but that was not to be and the vet could not get him
stabilized to move him to the clinic. His belly swelled and he got worse
and worse, his pain now showing through the shots, in which he had had enough
to knock out a horse for gelding and yet he was still walking around.
At 12:45 in the morning, after 6 hours of fighting and walking, crying and
hoping and three more shots of sedatives and still no relief, the vet called
me over and said that it was time for me to let him go and I was the one
who had to make that decision. I made the decision to stop his suffering
and pain. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. To have someone who
means so much to you, and to know the only way to save them from pain is
to let them go, is a feeling I never want to feel again.
We led him to our front yard and the vet gave him the shot, he slumped to
the ground and sighed, as though knowing it was time to let go. He died in
my arms, my tears on his face, as he shut his eyes for the last time
and felt no more. I cried in my friend's arms and finally gave in to fatigue;
wanting only to sleep and wake in the morning to find it was all a bad dream.
But when I awoke and looked outside, only two happy faces greeted me where
there should have been three. I felt hollow inside and empty, in which I
felt for a long time.
Now 6 months later and it's his second birthday that I write this and bring
closure. After a twist of fate almost two months earlier, I have a young
black colt who has the same eyes and the same face, though not the same color,
and the same great heart. And I believe he was sent by Link. So I call him
Nevada's Dark Spirit Chaser. "Chase." He will be forever chasing Link's
spirit.
I no longer feel empty inside, and when I think of Link I feel happy, I know
that's how he would want it. And so I write this tribute to my sweet prince,
who will forever run free and without pain in my heart, and always live happily
ever after in my dreams.
Jaime Smallwood,
15
In Memory of Link
Why? Why did you leave? Why
did you walk through the stars, and leave my empty heart so far behind? I
miss you terribly, but I know you were in pain, and are happy now. But my
eyes still long to see your gold dun coat, my ears still long to hear your
shrill answering whinny when I call your name to an empty stall. While you
are in peace, my soul still hurts, but as it is said, time heals all wounds,
however, the mark you left on my heart is not in pencil, but engraved forever
in stone. I miss you and love you and always will, please, don't ever forget
me, I know I'll never forget you.
Head of Grullo, coat of
Dun, he's a little mix-matched, but hey, he was young. We argued over which
way he'd go, dun or grullo, but we'll never know. Our boy was a star, a gifted
young colt; he was smart as a whip and quicker then most. He could fly through
the air, or stand by your side, act like a butt, or be so good you could
cry. He was Spanish by blood, a Sulphur mustang. His spirit was strong, and
long were his bangs. His eyes full of fire, till the very end, he fought
as he could, and just wouldn't give in. He was a special colt, our first
baby ever, we taught him and raised him, and in our hearts he will stay forever.
But he is now away from the pain and in some faraway place, where the air
is sweet and the grass is green. Our boy was something that can't be replaced,
his spirit lives on and in our hearts, he will race. We must just remember,
that he is safe and sound, and to this cruel earth is no longer
bound.
Where are you? My eyes can
no longer see your glistening coat in the warm rays of the sun, my ears cannot
hear your answering whinny when I call your name when I return from work.
I cannot smell your comforting earthy smell as I hug your soft neck and burrow
into your soft mane. My hands cannot feel your silky coat under them anymore,
or feel your warm breath on my skin. Where have you gone? My heart can still
feel you, but you are not there, why? My soul still waits for you, but is
it in vain? Will I never know you again? No, I will always know you, you
are always there, you have gone nowhere but to a place where time stands
still and pain is a mere memory. You are lost from my material world, but
in my heart will always stay, for as long as it takes, till we meet again,
in a distant time and place.
Jaime Smallwood
October 8, 2005
Sulphur's Primitive Link 
